Friday, March 13, 2009

I don't think I like pregnant women.

This is a new revelation for me.

I always figured prior to infertility, my disinterest in the pregnant population was simply because I was nowhere near wanting one of those little things run around, let alone growing in my stomach. Then when I did want one of those little things, but was all sorts of infertile and dealing with that, I thought my distaste of pregnant women was from my bitter jealousy I carried around like a torch. Then when I was pregnant and might have found some interest in talking to other pregnant women, I was on bed rest for 4 1/2 months and my human contact outside of my husband and doctor was limited to my glimpses of the mailman, who was clearly not pregnant at the time.

Now that I've done the pregnant thing, and have one of those little things running (okay, laying) around, you'd think I'd like pregnant women. We have something in common. We've both been there.

But I've come to the conclusion...that I don't care for them.

This doesn't apply to people I care about, this applies to other women. This applies to mere acquaintances. Strangers. The occasional co-worker that I never see or speak to.

I think it's a combination of the incessant complaining and the incorrect perception that everyone cares about you because you are pregnant. I'm sick of conversations that go like this:

Me to pregnant woman: "How are you doing?"
Pregnant woman: "Oh, ok. Getting up to pee 3 times a night! And my back is just killing me, I'm having the hardest time walking around. I'm totally swollen and this little bugger...ha!...won't stop kicking me! Sheesh!"
Me (on the inside): "Why are you still speaking? I was just being polite asking how you are doing. You should be polite and just say 'fine'."

I've found this applies to anyone that isn't currently pregnant, but want to complain about their pregnancy as well. As was my experience at a recent baby shower. Get a bunch of women together that don't really know each other, and they only thing they have in common is kids of varying ages and that's what the conversation turns to.

I truly don't care at all. Not unless you had some whacked out pregnancy with all sorts of weird and interesting medical conditions. Then, I'm interested. But if you had to pee, you were uncomfortable, your back hurt, you were nauseous, I'm not interested. Because you know what? You are pregnant! Did you think it was going to be comfortable to grow a human being?

There are tons of complications that make pregnancy miserable. Hyperemeisis (extreme nausea and morning sickness, not 'I need a Saltine and gingerale' morning sickness), PUPPS ( a brutal rash I feared with every fiber of my hypochondriac being), Bells Palsy (I also feared this after an especially touching episode of "Special Deliveries"), preterm labor, false labor, bed rest...the list goes on an on. But if you're just sucking on your Prego Pops and having a hard time getting comfortable in bed, please - if I ask how you're doing, just say "fine."


Alison 'n Brandyn said...

I TOTALLY get you on this!! As I'm wrapping up my last few weeks of pregnancies... I keep thinking something similar. When people ask me how I'm feeling... I've been saying "good" even though my back hurts, my hips hurt, etc., etc... all 'cause I keep thinking that if I say that *this* stage... what the hell am I going to be thinking while I'm *in* labor!!!

Brakes and Gas said...

Ha! I think pregnancy gives women license to be intensely self-absorbed. It is almost unavoidable (though some people take it to the extreme). I've tried to remain cognizant of this and save the descriptions of my compressed bladder for the people who have to love me anyways. My only hope is that most women return to their normal selves (outside of the heady environment of baby showers, of course) after their DC's birth.

Also, Chris Brown is a POS.

Katie (Mrs. Wubbin)

Stefanie said...

That is hilarious and so so true. Pregnant women are annoying.

Thanks for my award! So sweet. Just for that, I'm putting your smart ass on my sidebar.