Wednesday, October 21, 2009

It's official: I'm a germaphobe.

This is a vicious flu season. It's aggressive, and it's early. I've had the actual, real flu once in my life and it was awful. Really, you do feel like you're going to die. You want to die. It's that bad.

I got my seasonal flu shot as soon as I possibly could, and Chris and Sabrina got theirs as well.

But we can't get the H1N1 shot, yet. Chris and I probably won't be able to get it at all. Apparently, "healthy" adults from 25-65 are the last group to be allowed a shot, and poor mental health does not qualify you for the vaccine. I know, I told the woman answering the flu hotline how wrong that was, but she didn't agree.

I feel so vulnerable.

The instant someone says their throat hurts or they aren't feeling well, I start to feel sick. It's instantaneous. Literally my glands begin to swell the second the words leave their mouth. It's happened several times over the past couple weeks. I find myself washing my hands constantly, and each time I notice myself rubbing my eye or itching my nose, I immediately cringe and think I just infected myself with swine flu. See, just typing this is making my chest hurt.

Since Sabrina will qualify for the vaccine once it's available, I've developed a plan. I intend to take her for her shot, and as soon as they start to inject her I'm going to throw myself in front of the needle and hopefully get stabbed myself. Then I'll be safe. They'll still vaccinate her since she's part of the risk group, right?

Unfortunately, I haven't figured out a way for Chris to get the vaccine. Sorry, honey. I'll get you a nice hotel room if you come down with the plague.


minivan soapbox said...

You and I should just get a hotel room together - with our girls and hole up until this passes because you and I seem to be the ONLY TWO who are freakin' out! I JUST FINISHED giving my husband a 20 minute speech on how pissed I am....We were supposed to have a county wide - all children - mass vaccine this weekend. They canceled it. They didn't get enough of the vaccine. So, now my daughter can't even get it. In 4 weeks we're supposed to get on a plane for vacation - which is a flying petri dish of germs. I'm investing in surgical masks now. Ok. Rant over.

Brakes and Gas said...

I was told kiddos had to be 2 years old to get the swine flu vaccine? Was I lied too?! Is this part of some greater consipiracy?

saundra said...

I've been waiting for weeks just to get a regular flu shot for my son. Weeks!!!! Insanity!!!